How To Ruin Your Life 101

I always talked about how to fix things in your life, how to fix body language, how to develop positive thinking in this blog. I also spoke about stoicism which is basically thinking about something negatively so that you can prepare yourself for the consequences and repercussions of that. Today, I want to talk about the ways which will help you to ruin your life completely. This will help you to address your ongoing bad habits and issues which can be solved just by being mindfulness and conscious about it.

  1. Start consuming porn daily. It will help you to develop objectification of human bodies, your personal sex life will take a toll, and you will become an anti-social element slowly. This will help you to develop anxiety issues and also depressing symptoms. You will be an empty container of energy and people will avoid interacting with you.
  2. Start smoking weed twice a day. Be wake and bake hipster. Grow your hair and beard long so that they also smell of grass all the time. You will lose all your muscle mass and brain cells slowly. It will also help you to become an ‘intellectual’ on social media. You will start thinking that whatever you are saying is right and others are always wrong. You will develop a hateful relationship with your parents, and with everyone concerned about you, hence loneliness.
  3. Stop working out at all and starting eating lots of junk. The gym is bad for you. Also, after smoking weed and consuming porn, you won’t feel like hitting the gym. In fact, you would feel like eating more and sweeter munchies and junk. This way, you will develop bad posture and potbelly with lots of pimples and acne on your face. You will be less dominant in the crowd, and people will start disrespecting you. You will have to demand respect by fighting for it in parades and rallies organised by likewise people.
  4. Stop reading non-fictional books, biographies, reddits and documentaries. Instead, listen to Bollywood music about love, read more and more fictional love stories and binge Netflix. This will help you to develop a fictional world altogether, which would be full of unreal expectations, and you will be will emotionally unstable when those are not matched with the real world.
  5. Stop using social media as a tool, instead use it as a validation tool. Upload cringeworthy pictures (read: dog filter) and stories to get maximum likes and get offended if someone objects on the value you are providing to them. Fight and argue with people on all social media platform and get depressed about it. Ask for sympathy from other followers. Get jealous when someone shows off his/her car, apartment or beach/mountain life. Press the unfollow button instantly when you see someone is doing great in life.
  6. Stop getting out in the sun completely. Sun is your enemy, avoid light at all cost. Sleep entire day (thanks to the tiredness occurred because of porn and weed). And wake up in the evening and then binge-watch Netflix whole night. The absence of vitamin D in your life will help you to develop knee/back pain, lethargy and more tiredness.
  7. Stop drinking more than 1-2L water every day. More water = more washroom visits, do you want that? Obviously no. Drink as less water as you could, this will help you to develop bad skin, hair fall, dry lips and kidney issues.
  8. Stop trusting anyone around you. Always look at them with an eye of suspicion. Be it your Mom or Dad or your brother/sister or present government or the army of your own country. Add supreme court and other judiciaries as well in the list. Always question them in public, on social media, everywhere. Become the most chaotic person in your own group.
  9. Stop meditation or praying or deep breathing completely. Remember, after smoking weed, you must turn into an atheist who thinks that even spiritualism is equal to religious identities. Keep your mind in chaos 24/7. Be emotionally unstable and often cry in public and on social media for validation and sympathy.
  10. Consume as much sugar as you can. Eat sugary lattes in the morning, then biscuits and tea in the evening and ice creams in the night. Never say no to sugar.

 

I hope it helps.

 

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